My Life in Ruins
by CookieCutter101
Summary: Bella is being raped and abused by her boyfriend James but refuses to tell anyone. But when a certain family moves to Forks will Jasper be able to find out what's going on and save her? Read and find out. WARNING RAPE AND ABUSE. DON'T LIKE DON'T READ.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: ok hi guys this s is my first fanfiction story so constructive criticism is appreciated. This is also written from a personal experience so of course I have had to change it so it fits with Twilight. **

**Disclaimer: sadly I don't own Twilight S.M does.**

**WARNING RAPE AND ABUSE.**

**My Life in Ruins **

**Chapter one**

SMACK!

His fist made contact with my face. I knew that I was covered in blood and I was blue and black all over. The pain I felt was excruciating one of my ribs was broken I couldn't breathe properly. I gasped as his boot connected with my ribs and another bruise. It was getting harder to breathe. Spots blurred my vision.

"Get up you stupid bitch!" he roared. He grabbed my hair I felt a sharp tug on my head.

"I said get UP!" this time he pulled me up and got me to my feet. I knew that if I didn't get up now it was going to get worse. As I stood up my legs almost buckled from underneath me I grabbed the kitchen counter. My leg was broken. He pushed me into the wall and laughed as I stumbled and fell onto the floor once again.

"Make me food I'm hungry" he grunted "and clean up this mess" he walked into the lounge room. I heard the TV turn on.

I looked around at the kitchen. The table was overturned and there was blood everywhere. There was the glass cup on the floor he used to hit me over the head with. As I made my way to the sink I could feel every bruise, cut, broken bone in me. Most people would be screaming and crying from all this pain. I wasn't I wouldn't. Couldn't let him see me cry. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of hearing me scream. These things showed him that he won that I was weak. I slowly picked up the table. My body screaming in protest. Tears ran down my face. A combination of blood and tears. Once I picked up the table I took a breath. Stupid thing to do. I collapsed to the ground in pain. Sobs racked through my body. I calmed myself, and got up. I continued to clean the kitchen. Once every surface was spotless I got started on his lunch.

This is what I had to go through every day. This torture. But it's for my own good right. He loves me. If he didn't he wouldn't be helping me right? Yeah he does. He doesn't want to do this. He has to. It's not his fault its mine. My name is Isabella Marie Swan. Bella for short. I am 19 and live with my parents. I have plain short brown hair. It used to be long but I soon found out that long hair wasn't a smart idea. So I cut it short. I have boring lifeless brown eyes. They use to be so full of life but now... well they aren't any more.

After I finished making him his lunch. He looked at me. I silently prayed that he liked it. He took another bite.

"Well it's good to see that you can do something right" he mumbled. He hates complimenting me. I nodded.

"Now get out of my site and fix yourself up. You look horrible. But it's an improvement to what you normally look like." He smirked. Looking me up and down. Smiling at his handy work. I slowly made my way up his stairs. Then as fate would have it I slipped. And I hit my head on the floor. I yelped. I hated these stairs it was like they mocked me. I got up. And continued to walk up the stairs. I finally got to his bedroom and stripped down to my underwear and stepped in front of the full length mirror. I looked over my body. My hair was coated in blood. I could see pieces of glass. It dripped down my face. I had a long cut across my face. The tears that fell from my eyes fell into my cut it stung. But it felt good. To feel this type pain it was a change from feeling nothing or the other pain I normally feel. My gaze followed down my body. I was purple, black, blue, green and yellow. I could see where my rib was straining against my skin.

"Well, I was right about the broken rib." I whispered softly to myself. I sighed. And continued to look over myself. I looked at my arms and legs. There were cuts and scratches all over them. The cuts on my wrist weren't from him but from me. Yes I cut myself. But it saves me from feeling nothing and it's the only thing I can control.

I walked to the bathroom and got out a pair of tweezers and a plastic container. I stood in front of the mirror and pulled out the pieces one by one. Each piece falling into the container with a plink. After 5 minutes of pulling them out I threw them into the bin and got into the shower the water turned pink. I let the water relax my muscles. I moaned in pleasure as the warm water ran over my body. I stayed in there till the water turned clear. He banged on the door.

"Get out of the shower you worthless waste of space." He yelled. I quickly got out before he broke the door. I turned off the water and got changed into some clean clothes that I kept there for times like these and my clothes were destroyed. I opened the door and he was waiting.

"Sorry, I didn't know I was in there that long." I whispered. I didn't look at him he hated it when I did that.

"So you should be you stupid, fat slut" he shot back. "Don't use all of my fucking hot water you don't need it, it's not like your important"

I know everything he was saying was true. I was fat and stupid and I wasn't important.

"Isabella!" I flinched I hated my full name. I looked down and avoided eye contact.

"Look at me when I talk to you" he yelled

SMACK!

His hand connected with my face again. I felt the cut on my cheek open again. Blood ran down my face. I breathed through my mouth I hated blood. He walked away yelling something about not getting blood on the carpet. I walked back into the bathroom and fixed my cheek. I found my almost finished foundation. In these three years I have been with James (**A/N: I'm not using his last name because if any of my friends are reading this they will go to America and kill him) **I have realised that the hardest things to cover up are cuts. No matter how much foundation you use you can still see them. That's why James tries not to hit my face arms and legs. But if he did I would just say I fell. I was known for my clumsiness. My parents wouldn't ask. And if they did I would just say that I fell and they would just accept it. It wasn't unknown in this god forsaken town that I was a klutz. So it was easy to pass off as any bruise that **he **made as something that happened when I fell.

I got on the scales while I was there. 50kgs. I was fat. You could see the small bulge of my stomach. I was sickened with what I saw. I am fat. I walked to the toilet, bent down and put my fingers down my throat. The bile rose up my throat and into the toilet.

BANG BANG BANG

"Get your ass out of there!" he bellowed

"You need to get fucking home you stupid life-wrecking whore!" I flushed the toilet and got up. When I opened the door he had my stuff roughly stuffed into my bag. He threw it at me and glared. The pain spread through my head down through the rest of my body.

"Now get out of my house" he growled. He followed me down the stairs and just as I got to the last step he push me down it. I fell, my head hitting the ground. I screamed as the pain from my rib and head was intensified, my vision blurred, and dots appeared. I openly welcomed the darkness. The last thing I heard was James swearing. Then the darkness took over me finally relieving me of the pain I constantly felt. Then peace.

**Ok how was it. Good? Bad? Crap? I need feedback and criticism if I'm going to continue writing. So review and I will update as soon as I can. So about next week or so. Well I hope you liked my first story. **

**Lots of love eclipsebaby. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who reviewed to the last story and to those people who asked yes this did happen to me. However, I was a lot younger. So review and I shall update.**

**Disclaimer: sadly I do not own Twilight S.M does.**

**WARNING RAPE AND ABUSE.**

**Chapter 2**

I woke up to the smell of burning pancakes. Oh no Charlie is cooking. I opened my eyes then quickly shut them again. The light outside was blinding. I took a deep breath. But the quickly realized that that wasn't the best thing to do. I could feel my rib poking into my lung. This time I slowly opened my eyes knowing what to expect. As my eyes adjusted to the bright light I took in my surroundings. I was in my room. How the hell did I get here? I racked my brain trying to remember the last thing that happened. I was at James's, ok nothing unusual there, I spilt the glass of water then got hit, bathrooms, oh right yeah he pushed my down the stairs. But how the hell did I get here?

I tried to sit up but the pain pulsated through my body. My ankle was sprained, leg fractured, bruises and scratches everywhere they were normal. But I could feel new injuries. A broken rib, a chipped skull and a fresh cut on my wrist. I don't remember doing that. What the hell.

"Ok Bella, calm down your going to have a panic attack" I told myself. I jumped when I heard someone knock on my door. My body screamed. Tears sprang to my eyes.

"Bella honey, time for you to get up now" it was just my father. Charlie Swan, chief of police.

"Daddy?" I whispered

"Yes dear?" confusion and love laced his voice. I haven't called him daddy since I was 5.

"I don't feel so well can I stay home?" I asked trying to keep the tears from falling.

"No Bella, I'm sorry but you cant not today. You have to hand in your assignment" he replied.

"Oh right yeah I forgot. Its ok" I tried to keep the sadness from my voice. But I don't think it worked. He came over to me and sat down on my bed. He reached out to touch my arm. But I flinched away. I could see the pain in his eyes as I did. I slowly sat up ignoring the pain. And snuggled into my fathers' side and let him hug me. I winced a little as he placed his hand on one of my new bruises.

"Bella, I'm sorry I would let you stay home but you can't" he said

"If you didn't I would let you. But this is really important."

"Ok daddy" I said.

"Oh and just wondering how did I get home last night? I don't remember how I got home" I asked.

"Oh you fell asleep at James's while you were doing homework. He said you wouldn't remember and that you should get some sleep." His voice hinted with amusement.

"Oh right ok. Yeah I was very tired last night" I lied. I had gotten very good at lying. I had a lot of practice. When people ask how I got a particular cut or bruise. I couldn't say oh my boyfriend that I have been going out with for three years abuses me. He would kill me.

He kissed my cut gently and walked out of the room. I slowly got up wishing that with every step I could die. It all hurt so much. But I had to get over it. I wasn't going to break down. I couldn't he wasn't going to break me. I opened my wardrobe and looked for something to wear. I didn't have a lot to choose from. But I didn't care it's not like anyone is going to ever talk to me so I just wore my black jeans and my black My Chem. T-shirt. Every time I moved the pain just hit me. I hated this. All the pain. But it was my fault he loved me. He did this to help me. I just had to bare it. After the tortuous job of getting changed it was time to face the stairs.

"Ok Bella you can do this" I encouraged myself. I held onto the rail and looked down the stairs. I counted them. 1, 2, 3, 4…. 22.

"Sigh" I closed my eyes and took the first step down the stairs. The pain shot through my leg up through the rest of my body. After the first 5 I ignored the pain and just kept going.

"See I knew you could do this" I whispered. I felt slightly happy. Something I haven't felt in ages and walked down the hall, but stopped when I saw my reflection in the mirror. I was smiling. I was so shocked I hadn't smiled in 3years. It wasn't a big smile but it was a smile nether the less. It took a while for the shock to wear off. But after a while I walked – well limped- the rest of the way to the kitchen.

"Hi dad" I said cheerfully. Kissing him on the cheek.

"How are you?" he looked shocked to say the least. I laughed. Then stopped and grabbed my throat. I laughed. For the first time since I got together with James I had laughed. I sat down at the table with Charlie.

"Morning honey, I'm good. You? He said his voiced laced with shock and happiness.

"I am very good. I have finished all my homework and I had a very good dream." I replied. The last part was a lie. I had a horrible dream. I woke up three times last night crying, but I have to admit it was better than every other night.

He opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Oh that would be Angela to pick me up," I said.

"Oh ok bye darling have a good day" I kissed him on the cheek. I opened the do and said hi to Angela. We walked down the driveway and got in her car. Angela was one of my only friends. He didn't like me having friends. She was average height, quite, very nice and very good looking. Not that I would tell her that. We sat in silence for the car trip. Except to comment on things every now and then. When we arrived at school. James was waiting for me near the office, he didn't look happy. I slowly made my way towards him. He couldn't do anything to be during school. Which I was glad for.

"Hurry up you stupid skank." He snarled. I quickened my pace. There was no need to anger him; I had to see him after school anyway.

"After school today, my mother and father are going out, and your father is going out and I convinced him that you would be better off at my house." It was like the world had stopped spinning. It felt like my stomach dropped to my feet. I was staying with James. Over night. For 15hours, just me and him. I didn't realize I had stopped listening and he was still talking till his hand made contact with my rib.

"Listen to me you stupid whore! You are coming over to my house. I will drop you off at my house. I'm going out for a little while drinking with my friends. And by the time I come back I want dinner ready and the house clean. Ok you got that?" his voice was dripping with venom. I felt as though somebody had drained all the happiness from the world as I felt the blood drained from my face. This could not be happening. My father was basically sending me to my death. Why me why? The bell rung.

The day went by in a blur I vaguely remember Angela saying something about new kids arriving at school.(**A/N: ok I'm skipping period I, 2 and 3 and just go straight to lunch because nothing interesting happened and I don't really remember what happened) **the bell rang for lunch. I slowly made my way to the lunch hall. I pushed open the doors and walked past the queue for lunch I didn't eat lunch. Not cause I didn't like it but because I was trying to lose weight. Maybe then James would like me better. I walked to my table, sat down and pulled out my very tattered much loved _Romeo and Juliet_. I sat by myself James never sat with me he didn't want to be seen with me said it would make him look bad. So he sat with the popular kids. Angela sat with her boyfriend Ben and I didn't want to disturb them. So I sat at a big table by myself. I was so absorbed with my book that I didn't notice five inhuman gorgeous kids walk –well it was more like floated- into the hall. Just as they did the whole place stopped and whispered. It was only when they came up to me and a pixie looking girl cleared her throat.

"Umm excuse me can we sit here everywhere else is full?" she said, her voice sounded like a wind chime. I was shocked. She was talking to me. She was so short and her hair stuck out in different directions. On anyone else it would look really funny but she seemed to be able to pull it off.

"Umm yeah sure I was just about to leave" I stuttered, packing up my stuff. I was just about to leave when a pale hand stopped me. I looked up and a man with bronze coloured hair and liquid gold eyes smiled at me.

"No you don't have to go stay sit with me family and I. my name is Edward" his voice like velvet.

"Please join us." I sat back down and he smiled. They all sat down and Edward introduced everyone to me.

"This is Rosalie," he pointed to a blonde. She could be a model she had the curves, and her long honey blonde hair hung just at her waist. She glared at me. I shrunk back into my seat.

"Don't mind her; she is difficult to get along with. The man next to her is Emmett he is as harmless as a teddy bear and he is going out with Rosalie" he pointed to a large man that looked like he was on steroids. He smiled at me. For some reason he didn't seem as intimidating as James did.

"The lovely lady he is sitting next to is my wonderful beautiful girlfriend Alice, who you have already met." She smiled at me; she seemed to be bouncing in her seat. I couldn't help but smile.

"And last but not least is Jasper" he pointed to the person next to me who I didn't seem to notice, he was so quite. I looked at him and my breath caught and my heart started going at a million miles per hour. He was amazing he had topaz eyes and shoulder length hair that made Rosalie's hair look horrible. But he looked like someone had just kicked him in the nuts. He was in so much pain. I wondered what happened. He was clutching his rib. Someone cleared their throat and it wasn't till then I was holding my breath.

"Bella". My heart stopped I knew that voice. I felt a hand on my shoulder squeezing hard. I turned around and looked behind me. It was James and he was not happy at all.

"Who are you talking to?" he said nicely. His voice calm and dangerous.

"Hi I'm Edward Cullen and this is my family. Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper. We were just talking to Bella." I tried to plead to James with my eyes not to make a scene. And for once it seemed that there was a god.

"Oh well Bella and I need to go home now" he replied his voice had traces of venom in it.

"But the bell hasn't gone yet. I insist you both sit and have lunch with us" Edward seemed to be angry at what I wasn't sure. But the atmosphere around us had changed. It was tense; I looked around and saw that everyone at the table was glaring at James. Including Jasper who was still clutching at his rib.

"Well I guess we can sit for a little while" James said. I knew that when we got home there was going to be hell to pay. For the rest of lunch we sat and ate. Well James and the Cullen's ate I sat there and stared at the wall. No one really talked. Soon enough the bell rang and it was time for me to go home cause I had frees for the last periods. So I walked to James's and got to work on cleaning the house and doing my homework. I looked at the clock. 8PM just as I looked up my phone went off, a text. I pressed read.

_Be home at 8:30. Everything better be fucking ready for me and Mike he is coming over. There better be dinner on the table when we get there._

_James_

Ok I had 30minutes to make dinner. And hopefully everything will be ok and I can go to bed without a fuss. I made pasta not having a lot of time to make something extravagant. 10minutes till 8:30PM my phone went off again.

_Mike isn't coming._

I sighed in relief. Thank goodness Mike is a creep. I hated him he doesn't understand no. Everyday he would ask me out. And everyday I would say no.

20minutes later the door slammed open.

"Where the fuck are you, you stupid skank!" he slurred. Oh no he was drunk. This wasn't going to be a good night.

**A/N: finally it's up. I'm sorry this isn't so detailed but I try not to remember it. I'm still getting over the dreams and stuff. So you'll just have to bear with me. And this happened a long time ago like when I was ten so I don't really remember much. So did you like it did you hate it? I need your reviews. The more you guys review the faster I'll update.**

**Lots of love eclipsebaby.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: ok hi guys I'm back. This is chapter three. I hope you like it. Please tell me I there is anything I can fix or improve on. This chapter contains really bad abuse so I'm just warning you this one is a bit more intense than the others.**

**Chapter 3 **

He walked in and glared at me. I trembled but didn't let the fear show on my face. I know that tonight was going to be worse than all the others. No one was home. And they won't be till tomorrow. And today at lunch with the Cullen's that was going to cost me. I knew that I should have just left even if they really wanted me too. Damn Edward. I mean he couldn't just take no for an answer.

"I want dinner," he grunted. I put the plate down in front of him and got him a bottle of beer. He took a bite of the pasta. I was trembling from head to toe. I knew he was enjoying this. He smiled at me. Oh shit. I knew that when he smiled it wasn't going to be a good night. He picked up the plate. Before I could move he threw it at my head. It shattered at it hit the floor. I could feel the slow warm liquid fall down my face.

"What the fuck are you feeding me? Are you trying to kill my or something? You ungrateful little slut. You are lucky I'm even letting you stay here while your father is out!" he yelled. He was right I was ungrateful. He loved me. He was looking after me. I looked at the floor. I heard something slide off the oven top. Oh no the food. I didn't turn the oven off just in case he was late. I didn't want his food to be cold. That wouldn't be good. Just then I felt the hot pan connect with my back. I screamed bloody murder. He laughed. He liked hearing me scream. I fell to the floor in pain crying from the pain I felt everywhere.

"GET UP YOU LAZY BITCH! GET UP NOW! I LOVE YOU AND LOOK AFTER YOU AND THIS IS HOW YOU RE PAY ME? WELL WE'LL JUST SEE ABOUT THAT. GET ON YOUR FEET!" he grabbed me by my arm roughly. Then slapped me as hard as he could across the face. His hand never leaving my arm stopping me from falling over. I could taste the blood in my mouth.

"Please stop. I'm begging you," I pleaded but that just made him angrier. He grabbed my face.

"WHY SHOULD I STOP YOU FAT COW? HUH? WHAT ARE YOU TO ME? YOU ARE JUST A PATHETIC WORTHLESS WASTE OF SPACE! I WISH YOU WERE DEAD!" and with that he bashed me head against the wall. I screamed but was silenced by his hand over my mouth.

"Shut up you stupid whore. Someone might hear you." He threw me to the floor. I was sobbing. He kicked me in the ribs. Hard. He chuckled. Obviously please with what he has done. I couldn't move it all just hurt. Everywhere I felt like I was just hit by a bus.

"Now clean this place up. I want it spotless. Or else there will be pay tomorrow. Oh and did I tell you? Your dad isn't going to be home tomorrow. His flight was postponed and my parents won't be home till the same day as your dad because something happened with my sister" his eyes shined like a kid on Christmas day. He walked out of the room. The blood drained from my face completely. My world had come crashing down around me. I was going to die. I just knew it. I started sobbing.

Why was I such a horrible person? I ruined everything. James pitied me that's why he was going out with me. He didn't love me he pitted me. It all made sense now. And my dad he only loved me because I was his daughter. He had too. I wasn't wanted so why should I be here if I'm not wanted.

I wanted all of this to just go away. I hate life this isn't what it should be. I know I love him. But I just couldn't do this anymore. I shouldn't burden people with all my shit. It was mine to deal with no one else.

"Sigh, come on Bella better start cleaning before this can get any worse" it was kind of funny thinking this could get any worse. I don't think I could. But then again I've been wrong before. But I have to think that this can't get any worse or it will.

I slowly got up biting my lip so I wouldn't scream. Everything hurt my back, head, arm, ribs and now my lip, which was bleeding. I swept up the broken plate and put it in the bin. I got a mop and bucket and dry cloth so I could dry the floor. I got on my hands and knees. Silently I was praying that if I cleaned well enough James would leave me alone for the night. So I could sleep in peace. Each time I moved my whole body would pulsate and I would see spots.

2 hours later I finally finished cleaning. I was breathless from the rib sticking into my lung. My vision was so blurry I could barely see. I tried to stand up. But as soon as I was upright the whole room spun and the pain on my ankle and back was increased by so much I collapsed on the floor. As soon as I fit the floor I screamed in pain. Everything hurt so badly. I heard James get up from the couch. Oh god no please. I closed my eyes waiting for him to reach the kitchen.

"What the fuck is going on?" he yelled. "I'm trying to watch TV you stupid bitch" I heard his footsteps come closer. I opened my eyes slightly I saw him towering over me. I scrunched my eyes shut. Then out of nowhere I felt a sharp pain in my side. This pushed my rib harder in to my lung. I coughed and I looked at my hand there was blood. The room began to spin again. And my breathing became jagged. The room wouldn't stop spinning and with each kick it was becoming harder and harder till it was almost impossible. I knew I couldn't pass out. I didn't know what would happen. So I slowed down my breathing and tried to ignore the pain.

All of a sudden the kicking stopped and the room was silent except for the sound of my breathing. Then I heard footsteps walking away. Then stop. I opened my eyes just a bit. He wasn't in the room. I mentally sighed- it would hurt too much to actually do it- he was gone maybe he decided to stop. But it seemed as though the world loved proving me wrong because he appeared. He was holding something I wasn't quite sure what it was. But it was brown and looked like… ROPE! Oh god no this wasn't going to happen.

I ignored the pain and struggled to get up. But he was too quick for me and grabbed me by the arm. I started to cry and beg him to stop. But he didn't say anything. He dragged me up the stairs by my hair. I started screaming but he covered my mouth again like before. I couldn't let him do this to me I wouldn't. So I bit down on his hand hard. He roared and ripped his hand away from my mouth and pushed me down the stairs. I bounced down the stairs my body hitting every step. It felt like every bone in my body was breaking. The room started spinning and I couldn't breathe I could feel anything but the pain I was feeling. I was going to be feeling this in the morning that's for sure.

Then finally I hit the floor and that's when everything went black and I gratefully walked into darkness and her waiting arms.

**Hey guys, hope you enjoyed that. It took a while for me to type it but I did it. And yes typing this does kind of help me get over it. But I am sorry for taking so long. But it's up. Read and review. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: ok hi guys I'm back. Sorry this took so long to post but it was really hard to write this chapter and also my life has been crazy atm. And because of that reason I will be putting this on hold till I can get my life working. But I am not giving up on it. Ok well this chapter might be shorter than the rest. But anyway I hope you like it.**

**Chapter 4**

When I finally regained consciousness I wished I hadn't. It felt like I was on fire. My wrists hurt, I could feel the burn on my back and my head throbbing, my cheek stung like hell, every bone in my body felt like it was shattered and the pain in between my legs was... idk words can't even describe how I felt. Tears welled up in my eyes. It happened. He raped me. I was finally broken.

I tried to move to see what damage was done. But I couldn't. My hands and legs were tied to the bed. I couldn't get out! I tried to move my head to see what time it was. I saw the red number on my clock. 9am! Oh god I had to go to school. Oh shit oh shit oh shit this wasn't happening. I couldn't believe it.

I started crying. My body shook with sobs. And each time the pain was unbearable. I wanted to curl up into a ball and die. This wasn't supposed to happen. I hated this. I hated the fact that he could do this to me and get away with it. Then my sadness turned into anger, then rage and hatred. My mind was working overtime. I thought of all the things he had done to me and how he had gotten away with it time and time again. Every hit, punch, burn and kick. I wanted to scream at him I wanted to hurt him. But I couldn't. He was so much bigger and stronger than me. He would win. I knew he would. He always did. Slowly my anger was disappearing into an odd calmness.

I couldn't feel the pain anymore. It was as if my body was numb. It was wonderful. I couldn't feel a fucking thing. At first, I was calm then confusion took over. I remembered what he did and I couldn't feel anything it scared me. I couldn't feel anything but sadness. Maybe this wasn't such a good thing. I couldn't think of what to do. So I cried. I cried for my childhood that I never got, for the confusion of everything, for the pain that he caused me. Then I cried harder when I realised that in crying I was letting him win. I was showing him that I was weak the one thing I never wanted to be. I knew that if this ever ends I will be stronger. And I won't let people push me around. I will stand up for myself.

It felt like hours had passed but really, it was only minutes. Only minutes I sat there crying for everything.

*_ring ring, ring ring*_

Shit that's probably the school wondering where I am. Oh god. School I forgot about that. What am I going to tell them? "Oh I wasn't at school yesterday cause after my boyfriend knocked me unconscious he raped me tied me to the bed and forgot to untie me." Yeah like that would go down well. NOT.

"I should probably try and get myself untied so I can get ready for when he comes home." I sighed. He wasn't going to take being tied up as an excuse for not having dinner ready. I sighed. Ok come on you can do it. I tried to slide my hand through the hole. I was lucky I had really small hands or else this wouldn't be easy. I slid my hand out of the whole and bit my lip to stop from screaming. It felt like someone was poking me with a white-hot poker. Tears welled up in my eyes. But I pushed them back. I wouldn't cry. Not over something he did. I massaged my wrist. It felt a lot better now it wasn't rubbing up against the rope. I could see the rope burn around them. I couldn't bring myself to look at the rest of my body. I took a deep breath in and slid my hand out of the other hole. The pain flared up in my forearm and I knew it was broken. A tear fell. No I wouldn't I don't want to cry anymore. I thought about what my Angela use to say to her little brother when he cried, "If you cry too much you'll get wrinkles." I laughed. She was so nice and sweet. She deserved everything. She was the only person who cared about me. Truly cared about me.

"Ok Bella stop getting distracted. Its 10am and the pain coursing through your body will only slow you down. So you have to get up now" I encouraged myself. I leaned forward to untie the knots of the rope. If I thought the pain before was bad it was nothing compared to this. It felt like someone had run over me with a bus and had just taken me off a morphine drip cold turkey. I screamed bloody murder. It was a high-pitched shrill scream I was surprised myself that the glass didn't shatter. But that didn't matter, all that mattered was that I had to stop screaming or someone might call the cops and that would mean questions, questions I couldn't answer, and Charlie. Charlie who would find out how broken I was and disown me and send me to live with James for the rest of my life. But I couldn't stop. It was as if I had forgotten how too. I wanted to but the pain was too much. I slowly lay back down. The pain slowly ebbed away. I stop screaming and started breathing slowly. I was in so much pain I didn't even realise I was crying again. I never knew I had this many tears. I would have thought I would have run out of them soon, but obviously not.

"Fucking tears. I'm going to look a wrinkly old woman by the age of 19. And then I'll have to have plastic surgery as well as lipo suction." I grumbled. It took me a while before I could calm myself down to try again. This time I was going to take it slowly so I don't scream. I put one of the ropes in my mouth just in case and tried sitting up again. I moved my arms to lift my body off the bed. Then I slowly, while biting the rope lifted myself up slowly. The pain this time was gradually building up. And when it felt like too much I would stop and breathe. Finally, it was time to take off the rope from around my ankles. I slowly undid the knot. I could see the bruises starting to form already. Breathing as slowly and deeply as my ribs and lungs allowed me. Ok one down one to go. After I got the last one off I moved my ankles around trying to get the blood flowing.

"See that wasn't so bad. Could have been a lot worse. He could be really good at tying knots. " I whispered to myself quietly around the rope that was still in my mouth to stop me from screaming. Now was the hard part; trying to stand up. I sighed. I really wasn't looking forward to this not one little bit. The pain I was in now was barely bearable I couldn't begin to think of the pain I would be in when I stood up. But I had to do it. I knew that if I didn't there would be more hell to pay when he came home and everything wasn't ready for him. But before I could do all that I would have to go to the bathroom and clean myself up. That was something I was looking forward to. I loved showers, especially after a beating. It was somewhat relaxing.

"Ok Bella this is it. Brace yourself this is going to hurt like a mother fucking bitch." I warned myself. I slowly placed my feet on the freezing cold floor. I gasped as my warm feet touched the cold floor and instinctively pulled them back up. I knew as soon as I did that it would be like a million, no a trillion, needles and knives shooting up my legs. And I wasn't wrong about the pain. It was horrible.

"Mother fucking, stupid skanky bitchy whore" I swore. Tears pooled in my eyes. But I pushed them back. I wouldn't cry. Not now anyway. Slowly I put my feet on the floor it wasn't as bad this time. I breathed out a breath that I didn't know I was holding in. I sat there for a few seconds bracing myself for the pain I knew was going to hit me like a ton of bricks when I stood up. But I knew that no matter how long I sat there mentally preparing myself for this the pain would still hit me and I would most likely collapsed from the shock of the pain.

"Ok now time to get up and see what injuries he has caused this time" I encouraged myself. I gripped the headboard of his bed hard and a sharp pain shot up my arm. But it was nothing to what I knew I was about to endure. I slowly pushed myself up onto my feet. But before I could put all of my weight on my legs I fell onto the bed. The pain was excruciating it felt like someone had run me over with a bus. But I had to stand up. I had work to do. So, this time I bit the rope as hard as I could and slowly inch by inch pushed myself onto my feet.

I wanted to die. I really did, the burn on my back cracked and split when I straightened up, my ribs poked into my lungs making it hard to breathe, my healing sprained ankle throbbed, my broken leg felt like it had set wrong – I knew that was going to make my life hard-, all the blood rushed to my head making me dizzy, I could feel my cheek and head throbbing. I swayed for a minute and my vision blurred. I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry until I died. But I knew that couldn't happen. I had to keep going. I wouldn't let him win that way. I stood there for a few minutes not trusting myself to let go of the only thing stopping me from collapsing into a heap on the floor. While still holding onto the bed frame, I slowly took one step. My broken leg screamed in agony when I put all my weight onto it. Tears sprang to my eyes. But I pushed them back; I wouldn't become a sobbing mess. I slowly put it down and lifted my other leg up. My leg wobbled and almost gave out if it weren't for the fact that I was holding onto the bed frame for dear life. Good old bed frame.

I took a few more steps until I was 90% sure I wasn't going to collapse, pass out from the pain, or fall over. Then I limped into the bathroom. With each limp the pain in my legs would flare up making me gasp and tense up. Soon enough I finally got there. I couldn't look in the mirror yet, so I leaned on the bathroom sink for a little while to breathe and calm myself so I wouldn't pass out. After a few minutes, I looked up at the clock. 10.45am.

"Ok that's good it gives me 5hrs and 15minutes to get showered, dressed, clean some of the house make his dinner and if I'm lucky I might get some me time." This last part I highly doubted. I wouldn't be that lucky. Now it's time to see how much make up I will need to cover up all these bruises. I stripped down naked and stood in front of the full-length mirror; I took 2 breaths and looked up. To say I was horrified would have been the biggest understatement of the millennium. My face was swollen, red, black, and blue, and the cut on my cheek was infected. I looked down at the rest on my body and burst into tears. My chest was covered in bruises, you could see where my broken rib was straining to break out from my skin, my broken leg was crooked and was slightly twisted, and there was dry blood in between my legs. I turned around to see the damage done to my back. The burn was bright red and leaking, you could see the cracks in it.

I clutched the sick for support so I wouldn't collapse. I stood there sobbing. I never wanted this. I wanted to pass high school, I wanted to become a teacher or a writer or a dancer maybe. I wanted to have boyfriends who would buy me things, hugged and kissed me, cared about me, and maybe even tell me they loved me. I didn't want a boyfriend who would hit me to teach me a lesson, or who would rape me, or who would call me names and make me feel bad even if it was for my own good. This isn't how I imagined my life. Going to school, doing well in class, having a few friends, then coming home to a boyfriend who loves/pities me enough to beat me so I don't have to burden other people, clean, cook, then go home to a father whose only reason for loving me is that fact I'm his daughter. I hated this I hated all of this every part of my life so far has just been a boring routine. And I wanted a change. But I knew that was never going too happened. Unless by some miracle, which I know won't happen, some man on a white horse comes and saves me.

At that I burst out laughing. That was the most ridiculous thing ever. There was no such thing as knights in shining armour, sweeping women off their feet and riding away on a horse into the sunset. This ain't no fairy tale. This was reality, a horrible place where you have to go to school and be forced to do things you don't want to, to say no, only to have your will taken away from you. Thinking that there was such a thing as the perfect man to sweep you off your feet and make everything better was like thinking vampires, werewolves, fairies, and magic mirrors are real. I scoffed at the thought. Only in books and dreams did any of those things exist. Not real life, well not mine anyway. To think anything as amazing as that would happen to me was laughable.

I looked up at the clock again. 10.55am.

"Wow I really have to stop getting so side tracked." I mumbled to myself. I straightened up as best as I could without wanting to cry. Got into the shower and turned it on. I waited till it was the right temperature so it wouldn't cause my body anymore pain if that was possible. I watched at the water turned pink. Then carefully washed my hair and body so I wouldn't get soap on the cuts and burns. Then got out dried myself off, got dressed patched myself up- without throwing up or crying I might add- and then limped into the bedroom to assess the damage caused. I almost threw up. Then I was curious. Did his parents ever come up here? How did they not notice this? I assumed that they were never in here to see what their "perfect and wonderful" son did in his room. I stared in shock at the mess that was in here.

The 2 walls closest to the bed had bloody handprints and blood spatter on them. The floor has drops of blood in some places, and puddles/pools in others. The sheets on the bed were stained with patches of blood. There was also glass on the floor. And clothes scattered everywhere.

"Well this is going to be fun" my voice thick with sarcasm. First I should start with the clothes. So, I picked up all the clothes, folded the clean ones and put them away and put all the dirty ones in the washing machine. This took me at least 20minutes or so because each time I bent over the pain hit me like a brick. Next was the bed. I threw out the sheets knowing there was no way that the blood was ever going to come out of those. And went to the linen and got fresh clean ones.

You know there were times when I wondered whether whoever was up there really enjoyed watching me suffer. Why else would the linen closet down the stairs? I decided that I would get the sheets last. That way I wouldn't have to go up the stairs just to go back down them moments later. Why not just do the most painful things last? Made it easier for me.

After another 20minutes, I was finally finished the bedroom. So next was the lounge room. I knew it was going to be bad because that's where he spent most of his time drinking and eating when he wanted to watch TV. I walked out of the bedroom down the hall and to the top of the stairs. I didn't want to do this. I didn't want to walk down those horrible stairs. So I decided I wouldn't. I would slide down the banister. Something I hadn't done in years. And something I was really good at. So I lifted myself up onto the banister, pain shot up threw my body, but I tried to ignore it. Once I was on I relaxed for a few minutes to get use to it. Then slowly I inched down it. After 5minutes or so I was down, I was proud of myself for the first time in a while for finding a way around pain. I walked into the lounge room, and assessed the mess. There were beer cans, vodka bottles, and other various bottle scattered around the room. Well I guess we can't all be neat. And everyone has a few flaws. His just happens to be that he is a slob. So I got to work.

Finally, everything was clean and I felt like complete and utter shit. I was so tired and sore that I would if I could kill myself right then and there. But I knew I couldn't. I looked at the clock, 1.30pm. Wow, that only took me 2hrs and 15min. It felt like it took a lot longer than that. But this means I have an hour and a half left. It would take me at least 45-50min to cook dinner and then I could relax for the rest of the time. So I walked into the kitchen and put a pot of water on for the pasta and a pan with oil in it for the meat and vegetables. As I waited for that to boil, I prepared the vegetables and meat. After 10min, the water was boiling and I put the pasta in and stirred the meat and vegetables. Soon everything was cook so I took a small bowl for myself. It had seemed like ages since the last time I ate, and then realised it was ages since the last time I ate. I enjoyed the taste of hot food going down my throat and into my stomach. I turned off the stove and put his food in a bowl and into the microwave so when I heard his car I could quickly re-heat it and so it wouldn't be cold. I looked at the clock again. 2pm. That meant I had an hour to relax and do nothing before him came home.

I sat down on the couch and took a much-needed break. It only lasted a few minutes before I heard a knock on the door. My eyes shot open and I looked at the clock. It was 2.15pm, why was he here so early? Why hadn't I heard his car? I paused; wait a second why the hell did he knock on the door? It was his house after all. They person knocked again. Maybe if I didn't answer they would just go away. But the knocking just got louder. I sighed then slowly got up as so not to jostle any of my wounds I walked down the hall and looked the peephole. I was shocked. I opened the door.

"What are you doing here?" I stuttered.

**A/N: Cliffhanger. Sorry guys but I had to do it. Who do you think it is? And I need your help deciding something. Should I write the next chapter in the person at the doors point of view or Bella's? And sorry this took so long to post. But I hope it was worth the wait. So review. Please? And tell me what you think. And I now have a beta. Emmilin-Zahara-Rose (go check out some of her stories). I will try to get the other chapters up but I need to know whose point of view I should do it in so I can't start it yet.**


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